As a woman in business, I sometimes feel I’ve been taken advantage of, undervalued, struggled to find successful same-sex role-models who care more about relationships than they do about the bottom dollar.
Add all the programming we’ve received as females, how it’s bragging and narcissistic to honestly share what we’ve been doing.
Then for me, added on top of society’s standards, is how deeply my confidence is messed up from some of my life experiences – like growing up with a mentally ill father, getting my rib cracked by an ex, and years of fighting antibiotic resistant illnesses.
When friends tell me they’re proud of who I became, I feel like a fraud – like who’s life are they comparing me to?
Schnitzel has not been easy.
Yet I still show up with an open heart, hopeful mind, and determined spirit. I love what I do and the people I help. And I’m completely confident in what I teach and know to be true.
It’s only when I’m praised as doing something special that I shrivel into unworthiness.
My old programming expects me to be treated as if my work is meaningless… even though what I did was the pivot point that shifted them into multi-millions.
One of my relationship coach friends said people undervalue my magic because I’m operating below the conscious level of thought – opening them into new perspectives without them being aware that their entire view of the world will have irrevocably changed by the end of the discussion.
I’ve been learning to ask for permission more and more…
Working with a master relationship coach – a heart-based business coach who specializes in selling by giving – I learned how to help people receive the gifts I have to offer, instead of trying to prove I had something worthy to give.
You see, if you’re in business – then you’re in the game of relationships.
We’re all in relationship, with our clients, students, assistants, coaches, accountability partners, tribe, community…
You’ve heard the term work-wife, yes?
Well, the healthier my relationships, the healthier my business… and the stronger, more positive, and lasting change I can create in the world.
And the #1 relationship I’ve been focused on changing? My relationship with myself.
Even while writing this I could hear some of my negative self-talk coming forward – like when I told myself I do stupid things like abc… when in reality I know it’s that I let the sadness from being undervalued speak for me. Yes, that shadow side is still my voice – my victim voice – the little girl who feels kicked in the shins and sometimes just needs a hug. We all have those moments.
It’s how resilient you are after the monkey-mind makes it’s judgement that counts.
Changing your wiring can be really difficult.
Like really, painfully difficult.
Yet it’s merely a skill to be mastered.
Like learning to build a membership portal online? Brutal.
Or writing 50,000 words to create TWO new 50-page workbooks, 20-ish emails, and a whole new product line in less than TWO months? My fingertips have callouses…
Like launching a retreat, mastermind, and live event at the exact same time. Kinda insane…
And learning to change the language I use to speak to myself. It’s been a mindfulness meditation in motion.
I have so much working against me, yet I have so much going for me.
As I gear up to officially open the doors to my largest offering so far, I can’t thank you enough my friends. I wouldn’t be the me I am today if it hadn’t been for the impact you’ve made in my life.
I’m blown away by the love and support my tribe shows each other… and me.
So thank you for being here…
❤️ in pure gratitude.